I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
