Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
