Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
