she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize