it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Randomize
