By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize