wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
