what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
