Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Randomize
