He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
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Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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