I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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