If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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