Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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