You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
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i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
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If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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