Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
