I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize