before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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