its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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