Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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