oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Randomize