so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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