My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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