I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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