So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
this boner is exhausting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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