I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
