one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
