i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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