Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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