I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
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