so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
do herpes really smell.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
