Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize