her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
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