I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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