how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
