Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
