nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
You ate ashes out of my bong
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
