he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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