You can't special order awesome
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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