I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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