He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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