FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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