he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
