he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
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