Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Randomize
