me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize
