Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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