there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
