Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.