Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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