there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
