I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize