you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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