Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
